Cam

Kristie and I took my parents to the mortuary today to see Cam. They were unable to fly out from Louisiana (where they are on a mission) in time to see Cam at the hospital. He looks absolutely peaceful. It is a stark contrast to the usual vivacious and lively boy that we all knew. Of course, he doesn't look quite the same. But, all in all, Darren did a wonderful job. It was epecially nice to know that Cam was in the hands of a friend.

You guys, our little boy filled up the whole damn casket. Being with him this week has slowed time down to a crawl, and yet this week and the last 16 years has gone by like Cameron running through the kitchen. As we prepare some memories of Cam, we get to relive many experiences that maybe we would have otherwise forgotton. Like the day he broke his femur (he was 6). That was a day that also lives in infamy. We remember his determination.......not to get up and walk around around after his surgery. We told him that the Dr. wanted him to get up once in a while and walk around to get his leg exercised. As we tried to help him set on the side of the hospital bed and then stand, he yelled as loud as he could, "I'M NOT DOIN THAT!" It was one of those things that is both the saddest thing in the world and makes you completely lose it laughing.

As we remember the time with Cam it is both sad and happy. We will miss him, especially the little idiosyncracies that made him who he was. I guess we should learn to love the little things that bug us most about each other because it seems that those might be the things we would miss the most.

Cam is wearing the leather jacket that his thoughful Mom got him for Christmas. Cam didn't ask for a jacket because he already had one he found at our stake clothing swap. Now, keep in mind the old one was fake leather (vinyl) and had rips and tears everywhere and needed to be sent to space. He didn't care, he loved it anyway. But, Mom thought it needed replaced so she shopped long and hard to get one that would fit into our Christmas budget. She was successful and found a jacket that became inseparable from Cam. He is also wearing the pink tie that I found him for the Sweeheart's Dance with Page. Now, it is a little bright because I don't know baby pink from fuschia but Cameron wore it every time he wanted to dress to impress. Also, you won't be able to see, but he is wearing his skater shoes that we tripped over every night somewhere in the house.

It isn't getting any easier but we feel loved and supported by you all. Thanks again.